Inspirational quotes from a classic TV show

You know that one quote you live by? Everyone seems to have one."Do what you can with what you've got wherever you are."

"You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try."

"Watch the little things; a small leak will sink a giant ship."

Those are nice and all, but sorry, they don't cut it.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the most important quote generator of a generation. And no, it's not a philosopher, scientist, or Dr. Phil. In fact, these words of advice far surpass anything that will ever come out of Dr. Phil's mouth.

Homer Simpson, take it away.

"Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."

"Here's to alcohol, the cause of-and solution to-all life's problems."

"I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to speed around a city, keeping its speed over fifty and if its speed dropped, it would explode! I think it was called...'The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down.'"

OK, so maybe that last one may not count as advice to live by, but seriously, it's pretty damn funny. I can understand why "The Simpsons" has had its fair share of controversy over the years, but come on, some of the quotes that came out of those characters' mouths throughout the years are just hysterical.

I grew up quoting so many various characters on the show that I can probably sit here and quote scripts of that show verbatim. Whether I should be proud of that is a conversation to be had another day, but I know I am not the only one who uses Simpsons quotes in their daily lives.

At least one other person reading this has to have screamed "Go Banana!" at some point in their lives, just like Ralph Wiggum did when he tried to race a banana against an orange and grapefruit. Obviously, due to the lack of a banana being round and able to roll, he lost that race in an embarrassing, yet overwhelmingly funny fashion.

Or how about that one time when Mr. Burns, so confused out of his mind, shrieks, "Whoa, slow down there maestro. There's a 'New' Mexico?"

Better yet, Burns offers some of his own worldly advice, proudly preaching that, "Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business."

I don't care that the show has dropped in quality over the past few years. In fact, it deeply saddens me. But not only is that quote funny, those first 10 seasons or so provided enough humor to fill a brain's worth of brain cells. In fact, that pretty much describes my brain.

I have run into quite a few people in my life who are not Simpsons fans, and while I respect their opinions, they are oh so wrong.

How can you not laugh when Bart claims, "Remember, you can always find East by staring directly at the sun."

Or that one time when Lisa apologized to Homer by saying, "I still believe in protecting animal's rights, but that still doesn't excuse what I did. I'm sorry for wrecking your barbecue, dad." To which Homer replied, "That's okay, honey. I used to believe in things too."

Inspirational? No. Words to live one's life by? Probably not.

The funniest television sitcom to ever run across my TV screen? Absolutely.

I will give Family Guy and South Park their credit. Those shows are funny. But even they both admit that they draw a huge amount of inspiration from The Simpsons. You know those random jokes and gags that are so prevalent in Family Guy? Seth McFarlane openly admits to getting the basic idea of that concept from "The Simpsons." And "South Park," well, "South Park" dedicated an entire episode to "The Simpsons," titled "Simpsons Already Did It," which basically stated that "The Simpsons" had already used up all of the 'good' ideas for animated comedies.

Basically, "The Simpsons" are great. I grew up on that show as much as, if not more so, than anything Nickelodeon or Cartoon Network had to offer me as a kid. "The Simpsons" has some of the most fantastic and culturally relevant gags out there, and they always succeed in making fun of the world in an incredibly clever way.

And then there is Ralph Wiggum.

"My cat's breath smells like cat food."

Oh Ralph Wiggum, how I love thee.