Advice for seniors

OK, I admit it. I was tempted to write a graduation speech, but I found the request for submissions rather cliche and cute. I gather that GPAs automatically make a person qualified to be a great writer and speaker. But what I've found over my life course is grades don't necessarily make the person, and even "C" students have meaningful things to say.

Consequently, my "A" speech was absent from consideration. However, I don't want to miss this final opportunity to leave graduates of CSU Stanislaus with some advice. Here is my Top 10 for the Class of 2009.10. YOU ARE ONLY AS STRONG AS YOUR WEAKEST LINK.and it's up to you to make that link stronger. I coached competitive soccer for many years and this was a mainstay in my repertoire. Each season proved to be uniquely challenging, yet the payoffs were big when the strongest players recognized that the weakest players could perform miracles when encouraged and respected. It is important for each person to play a key role in any group dynamic. You'll be surprised at the transformation of the group and the personal rewards from building trust and camaraderie.

9. IF YOU WANT LOYALTY, GET A DOG. I've heard this a great deal lately in political circles because there's some truth to it. After 16 years on the job, my profession was hit hard by economic times. Nobody's position was exempt from extinction and it wasn't personal. If you expect loyalty from a company or organization, you might be disappointed. Be true to yourself and the others around you. The rest will fall into place.

8. THERE ARE EXCEPTIONS TO THE RULE. While we often hear this isn't the case in academia, can you imagine the world today if it wasn't true? Shaquille O'Neal was told as a youngster he was too big and clumsy to play basketball and should be a soccer goalie instead. If someone else hadn't come along and recognized Shaq was an exception, well, enough said. Don't hide behind the rule - be the exception.

7. WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS DOESN'T NECESSARILY STAY THERE. The first company picnic I attended many years ago served free beer and wine. One of my co-workers was feeling the "truth serum" and began freely sharing her opinions about the work environment with the vice president. Come Monday morning she was hauled into the chief executive's office. It isn't rocket science. Be careful when you are out in public, especially on Facebook and MySpace. It could come back to haunt you.

6. LEADERS ARE SELDOM IN CHARGE. When we hear the word "leader," we automatically think of greats like Churchill and Ghandi. What I have found is the people behind the scenes, more often than not, are more powerful and effective than the figureheads themselves. You don't have to wear the captain badge on your arm to be the leader. Step up even if it doesn't come with a title.

5. LYING IS ONLY CHEATING YOURSELF. Perhaps I am preaching to the choir, but lately I can't believe the amount of "stories" that students tell their classmates or professors when they fail to come through on a project or assignment. Incompetence becomes more apparent when left untended. Why not just come clean so others can step up for the sake of the group? Others can't help you if you don't help yourself. Take responsibility. Anything less leads to a life of disappointment.

4. NEVER FLY A TAILDRAGGER WITHOUT LESSONS. My husband is a private pilot. He learned to fly in a tricycle-wheel, but the first plane that he owned was a taildragger. Engineer and logic superseded common sense when he was determined to teach himself how to fly it. A new oil cooler, propeller, and bruised ego later I made him take a couple of lessons that cost much less than the repairs to his plane. There is value in expertise. Seek advice and ask for help when you need it. Life is a long and arduous journey to walk alone.

3. PURSUIT IS HAPPINESS. Part of the American dream is the pursuit of happiness, but often the victory is much less satisfying than the process endured to attain it. Hence, never stop following your dreams because it is in the hunt of perfection that we find the greatest satisfaction.

2. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR FACE. When I need some motivation, I pop in Natasha Bedingfield's CD "Unwritten," crank up the volume, and sing "no one else can feel it for you, only you can let it in" at the top of my lungs. Embrace each moment. Even the painful spaces have a silver lining. What seems like imperfection might cause you to hold back. If you do, you'll miss what could be some of the best times of your life.

1. COLLEGE DOESN'T PREPARE YOU FOR THE JOB; COLLEGE PREPARES YOU FOR THE JOURNEY. I have to agree with students who say that college does not prepare a person for employment, but job training isn't the focus of higher education. While students do learn some skills like multi-tasking, prioritizing, and meeting deadlines, much of what they learn is of a higher order. The take-aways from the overall experience are commitment, maturity, diversity, confidence, and the social skills to persevere after graduation. As Ben Sweetland said, "Success is a journey, not a destination.